So, my laptop has somehow lost every word that I had ever written. Gasp!!! Yes, gasping would be the correct emotion right now.
Every poem, every journal entry, every word, every picture, every video...everything that had any emotion attached to it. (Incidentally the only things not deleted are SPSS installers and games.) My entire last year, was on this laptop.
Things I had written, things I had created, things- words that I had nurtured and shared with others, creating a bond with these 'readers', things that cannot be recreated. Things that I thought I would be showing to my children and their children, things that I would not show to anyone, things I had written only for me...all gone.
I always thought that if you do lose these works you can always rewrite them. But that is, as i have realised, IMPOSSIBLE. I cant bring myself to write again. I cant even start afresh. I always did consider the words as my children, and the loss is inexplicably depressing.
I, somehow, always thought the words would succeed me. And not vice versa. This has to be the worst nightmare of any writer. And here I am, living one nightmare after the other. I truly have lost myself...
This post is almost a half hearted goodbye for my sabbatical/hiatus or whatever the kids are calling it these days.
This post is to say goodbye dear Wordies, and thank my friends who have given me words of encouragement and more importantly who have given me inspiration to write... I bow!
Till the next post, let me mourn this, the best I can.
7 comments:
heyy ...
I really dunno what to say :( ...
except, i really admire u for this .. for taking it in ur stride ... i wud have gone bonkers if, god forbid-...!!
i rem one day i discovered one of my old trashy looking registers ...which had a lot of my important scribbles was nowhere to be found at home ...
and i realised that i had probably lost it to the Raddi guy forever ... I was soooo sad :( ..... frustrated beyond all reason ...
wat to do, really ...
it's only thoughts, and thoughts put into words- that i have ..
and i guess...same is the case for u ...
May god be with you
May u be able to retrieve at least SOME of ur memories frm Gulab Singh ... (err... is that ur cell or is that the laptop?)....
will pray for u ...
love n cheers!
:)
del kassidy is the laptop... kassidy for short. del cos its dell mfg and all...
gulab singh is the mobile...
thats not the issue here.
i know the raddi wala feeling.. once gave an old journal to a junior thinking it was my notes...
:)
silly things those...
but some memories do survive...
thru my blog...
thank god i had the brilliant idea of publishing all of my work on the blog, otherwise, nothing would have survived!!!
anyway,
cheers and good luck to me!!!
:D
hullloo .... errm... I hate being so very immodest BUT, u cud acknowledge my wise Advice in asking u to return to Blogger!! :O .. "brilliant" idea it ws ... and i deserve some of the pats too ... :D :D
mewonders: how cum ur Lappie ain't desi like gulab singh et al ?
cheers!
Its really very sad to hear bout ur lost wordie. (How did it happen?)I must state here that things un said or un written can create some of the worst situations, one like yours, so its always good to either say what you need to say or write, as in the case of the blog. At least u could be happy of the content uve saved on blog:)...
@fotedar,
yes ron,
u did introduce me to the world of blogging and i thank you for that.
and also i acknowledge tht u gave me strenght to write when i had none, and i cud fill up a page with this. but lets leave tht for the foreword i shall write for ur book.
:)
abt the differnet names ..(adding to tht the iPod is Alexis)...and i m brangelina, some kids are indian, some european, some south american, some scandanavian,...
:D
@sumeet,
i see jon mayer has had some real effect on u with his song, "say,..say what u need to
say"
and i m happy i sad a lot of things here and otherwise, cos it wud b tragic if u cudnt say things you REALLY needed to say..
will tell u the story soon...
hoping to return here soon...
Losing all data(i know calling it as data is the same as terming tears as salt-water, but maybe overlooking the emotions involved would help)might just be an indication of greater things to come(somehow ,great things happen to us rather than we creating them).
And what's this nonsense(plz don't b offended,no other word sounds more apt here)about your taking a sabbatical? I request(implore) you absolutely desist from any such craving. You are a pleasure to read , so plz don't b selfish enough to deprive us of a source of contemplation and enjoyment.( i am seriously thinking of putting the entire thing in a bracket too)
hi,
so nice to hear from you again!!!
i actually was trying to figure a way back to ur blog cos i lost tht as well!!!
anyways...thank you for the compliment!!
:)
i bow!! and soon i shall post!!
cheers!!
pls do keep on cuming back and leaving ur foot prints here on the comment page!!
bbye
god bless u!!
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