I didnt know...

Love teaches you a hell lot of things....here's what I learnt!!!

I didn’t know…

I said I didn’t know love till I knew you,
But I didn’t even know hate, till I knew you,
Cos I haven’t yet seen such despise in anyone’s eyes,
That I see now in yours and in mine.

In reality I knew nothing up till now,
I didn’t know jealousy, I didn’t know faith,
I didn’t know anger, I didn’t know insanity,
I had never been driven to such lengths.

I hadn’t known the malevolence of my soul,
The ugly soul that I have, the evil thoughts it harbours,
I didn’t know the weakness of my character,
The coward that is I, the way it wants you to suffer.

I didn’t know I was going to fall for someone,
For someone so wrong, someone I would never have,
And be bruised for life, shattered and broken down,
I didn’t know I would learn and abandon love.

I didn’t know that you really haven’t lived until,
You have loved someone with all your heart and soul,
I didn’t know the emptiness within me, the hollow me,
The incomplete I was waiting for you to make me whole.

Funny thing about that is now I am emptier than before,
Burnt, scared, and determined never to fall again,
Enraged and vengeful, almost proud of my new self,
And so I choose a life of not happiness but pain.


31st January 2008.
Something snapped inside of me; can’t figure out what it is.